Needle in a Haystack Part 1
June 23, 2026
Needle in a Haystack Part 1
Welcome to this week’s series of Daily Reflections on “Needle in a Haystack.”
In May 2009, just eight months after the heartbreaking loss of our son Ben, Lark and I found ourselves in a profound spiritual desert. Eight years of battling his illness had left us overwhelmed and emotionally exhausted. Deep grief overwhelmed us. As people of faith, we believed that God cared for us, but in our pain, we could not feel God like we had hoped and prayed for. It was as if our prayers were echoing off the ceiling, and in our darkest moments, we questioned if God even knew where we were.
During this time, our dear friends, Buddy and Charlotte Mullis, invited us to visit them in Tucson, Arizona. Together, we ventured into the desert, seeking solace and adventure amidst the majestic Saguaro cactus trees, which can tower up to 50 feet, weigh several tons, and live for over 200 years.
In the middle of nowhere, we had stopped to explore the desert and these amazing trees; the desert was eerily quiet, with no other people or signs of life. We wandered among the towering cacti. Lark and I had never been so close to these beautiful trees, which at that time of year had colorful blooms. I remarked to Lark that their spines resembled millions of toothpicks. In a moment of wonder, I reached out to pull a prickly spine from one of the trees. To my astonishment, what I dislodged was a single manufactured, wooden toothpick!
Out of all the countless spines, my fingers found a toothpick nestled among all the cactus spines. Of course, we all gathered around to inspect the toothpick. And sure enough, it was a real toothpick that a hiker must have placed in the tree, and said to themselves,” Well, no one will find this in a million years!”
After contemplating the chances of finding such a thing, we could not simply chalk it up to “fate.” Instead, it felt right to look at the occurrence as a message from the universe. Then it dawned on us: it was God’s response to our grief, a reminder that God was indeed with us, even if we might not feel God. It was as if God was saying, “I can pinpoint exactly where you are, and I am with you right here, right now.”
Spiritual Practice and Inquiry
Is finding your way sometimes like searching for a needle in a haystack? Consider journaling your thoughts, expressing them in a poem, or creating artwork. Is there something you seek now that seems elusive? Stay open to the signs and wonders that weave themselves into our lives. Look for them with new eyes.
Prayer
Dear God, What a precious gift you bestowed upon us at the cactus in Tucson. It guided us onto a path of faith and wisdom, away from loneliness and despair. For all who find themselves in spiritual solitude, I pray. Amen.
