The Hidden Power of Loss and Grief Part 6
May 3, 2026
The Hidden Power of Loss and Grief Part 6
Loss carries an immense power. It can undo us, weaken us, stab us, and at times make life feel almost unbearable. And yet, loss also holds another kind of power… the power to shape strengths within us, that we might never have known otherwise… strengths that become part of who we are.
Yesterday, on my way to the recreation center, I drove past the bustling park where Lark and I once took Ben and Lauren when they were small. I pass by that park every day. But this time it was different. It was empty, except for a young father and his little boy. They stood beneath the very tree where Ben and I used to play, and near the slide where I always played with Lauren.
I kept driving, but something in me sank. In another time, in another life, that would have been me and Ben, or me and Lauren. A wave of flashbacks and feelings arose. I found myself wanting to stop the car, walk over, and gently say to that father, “Savor this. Take it in. Know how precious this is.” But I did not stop. I simply drove on. As is typical with deep grief even years after a loss, in just one second, we can weep just as hard as when we first experienced the loss. I wept. I cried. I wailed. Oh, what I would give for just one more afternoon at the park with Ben and Lauren.
And yet… as the sadness slowly softened, something else began to emerge—something subtle at first, but deeper.
Gratitude.
I must admit, gratitude now lives in me in a way it never did before my losses. There was a time when I assumed many things were permanent—unshakable, enduring, almost guaranteed. I took for granted the people and moments that seemed like they would always be there.
But life gently, and sometimes painfully, teaches us otherwise.
We come into this world surrounded by “givens” such as our body, caregivers, relationships, the world itself. As children, we do not question them. But over time, we learn that nothing we are given is promised to remain. Some of my losses, like those of many dear souls I know, are beyond words. And yet, even in their depth, they have given me something unexpected… the power of gratitude.
And gratitude may be one of the most powerful antidotes to despair. As I drove away from the park, the heaviness in my heart rose to its fullest. But then, from somewhere deeper, my soul lifted—not away from the grief, but within it into gratitude.
Gratitude for the memories.
Gratitude for the love that was and still is…
Gratitude for the love that still finds me—in new forms, in dear souls, and in the presence of a God who cannot be taken away.
Spiritual practice: Journal about your losses. For each one, gently ask: What gift, however hidden, has this loss given me? What strength has it formed in me?
Self-inquiry: Why does an antidote carry power?
Prayer:
For the dear souls who now fill the spaces once held by others, I give thanks and praise. Amen.
