Time Well Spent Part 5
February 5, 2026
Time Well Spent Part 5
Imagine waking up tomorrow in a world without friends. Now imagine a lifetime without them. Something essential would be missing… not simply companionship, but Sacred Kinship. Some of the most meaningful time we will ever spend is time spent in sacred kinship, for friends are not merely companions on the journey; they are part of the journey itself.
Every relationship we enter, whether professional or personal, service-oriented, or intimate, neighborly or lifelong, shapes the path we walk. The people we know and encounter do not just accompany our lives; they help form them.
Kinship is a sense of oneness between us and another. Yet sacred kinship is not merely the universal bond of being human together. It is the affection and attunement that arises between people of like minds, hearts, and intentions. The early Greeks named this form of connection “philia,” a love that is intimate, warm, compassionate, and empathic, grounded in a shared bond. While philia resembles familial love (storgē), it carries a distinct quality of its own: we love our friends based on shared ways of being.
Sacred kinship may arise between two people or within a group. One-to-one kinship is especially holy because it transcends ordinary relationships and is marked by a mutual need that only someone who truly shares our heart can meet. Such relationships may operate at the level of ego or at the deeper level of soul. The difference between the two is profound.
Ego-based friendships can be meaningful and even deeply intimate. They engage all three centers of intelligence: thinking, feeling, and being. And these friendships often involve closeness and shared experience. Yet they remain structured mainly by the ego’s story: its needs, story, desires, fears, and expectations. Ego friendships are not “less than” or unworthy; they carry a different quality and depth. Many collective relationships, such as neighborhood groups, clubs, professional associations, and even religious organizations, also operate primarily at this level of kinship.
Soul-based friendships, by contrast, arise from our depths. This is sacred kinship: a relationship born not from the false self, but from as much of our true nature as we can access. Here, there is no pretense, no competition, no need to manage impressions. There is no second-guessing and no demand for perfection. The three centers of intelligence are nourished by the soul's energy rather than organized around the ego’s mental structure and narrative. These relationships are spacious, transparent, and not ruled by judgment.
On a collective level, sacred kinship emerges within groups bound by philia, a shared love that arises from the soul itself. Such groups carry a palpable sense of belonging and meaning that cannot be manufactured. Occasionally, organizations and communities also embody this depth of connection. When they do, they become more than institutions; they become living expressions of sacred kinship, places where love, purpose, and belonging meet.
Time spent with sacred kin builds the soul. When I am fortunate enough to be with my soul friends, I am impressed by how little needs to be said. Understanding is already present. Acceptance is already given. Shared values and resonant interests are felt rather than explained. Time spent in such relationships is creative, restorative, and life-affirming in ways that ego-based relationships are not.
Spiritual practice: Who are your Sacred Kin? Draw a family “tree” naming each and depicting their ties to you.
Self-inquiry: What is the difference for you between an ego friend and a sacred friend?
Prayer:
For my soul friends I am so very thankful. I wouldn't want to go through life without even one of them. Amen
