The Last Straw Part 5
June 26, 2025
The Last Straw Part 5
The last straw can also mean that something is finally finished. Yes, things have developed to the point of full maturation and need to end, collapse, dissolve, resolve, capitulate, wind down, or terminate. This is not always a sad thing. Indeed, many things simply run their course, and the last straw is marked by their swan song and capitulation.
Some may say that our lives are that way: we simply run our course, wind down, and then pass away. I prefer that no one has to die. But my ego does not know the bigger picture nor why the grand design includes eventual death for all living creatures. To believe in a grand design is a wonderful thing.
I was a 23-year-old grad student in New England where I had become part of the Society of Friends (the Quakers.) At one of the social gatherings, the subject of death came up, in a small group of us. We were sharing our views when one petite and demure lady made a three-word contribution to the conversation. I will never forget her one short sentence that rings in my ears. She said, “I trust death.” Those three words seemed to go from her depths right into mine. As for me, at that period in my life, I was not ready to look at death, much less trust it, so I filed the words away knowing they profoundly touched my soul.
My ego did not agree with death, and it still has objections to it. It has many more options than having our lives come to an end. After grad school, I was a teacher in a medical school and became aware that death was considered the enemy for medical school professors, students and residents, who were taught to fight it with all their might. I was part of that ethos. And it’s a good thing, I suppose, that medical doctors are taught not to give in to death but to keep people alive! That part of my career reinforced my ego’s resistance to death.
Then, in the practice of psychology and therapy, I became more acquainted with death by experiencing how people dealt with it. Many faced it square on, and others dismissed and denied it. Coping with death became part and parcel of my work because loss and grief run underneath most issues of life in one way or another. Then came our having to deal with loss in a way that we never dreamt it would come. Trusting death made so much more sense after the loss of our son, and now it makes even more sense after the loss of our other child, Lauren.
I never forgot the words of the Quaker lady: “I trust death.” Now I understand why they struck me so profoundly; on some level, my soul needed to hear, digest, and embody those words even though my ego didn’t know what they meant and couldn’t have cared less. When I heard those words, my soul said, “Yes,” but at that time and at my young age, I was consciously unaware of that exchange. So now, in reflection, I now realize that my ego has drawn its last straw and capitulated to my soul in regard to death. Now, I too, trust death.
Spiritual practice: Journal your thoughts about the news sources you listen to and Jesus's statement: “Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free.” (John 8: 32)
Self-inquiry: Why would you believe the news?
Dear God,
Please guide me to the sources of truth. Amen
