Control Part 5
October 3, 2025
Control Part 5
Jeremy was involved in a large organization whose leader was engaging and charismatic. He believed in the well-respected leader. But Jeremy sold his soul for the approval of that leader by making himself available to him around the clock. Next, Jeremy quit his day job to be the leader’s personal right-hand man. Living at the beck and call of the leader, Jeremy had little time for his personal life. But he had one small side business, which demanded his time every Tuesday evening. One day, the leader asked him to give up his side interest to be at his disposal on Tuesday evenings. This left him with only Sunday afternoons off to be with his parents, who also needed him.
It was hard for Jeremy to tell the people he served on Tuesdays that he could no longer be involved with them. But he did it because his greater concern was that he’d lose his position if he did not follow the leader’s wishes. The leader owned Jeremy.
As time passed, the leader asked Jeremy to give up his one day with his parents. “But you know how important it is for me to be with my folks on Sundays,” he said to his boss. The boss did not respond because he knew Jeremy would comply. But the leader misjudged how far he could go. Jeremy turned in his resignation.
In the aftermath, Jeremy learned that he was in large part, to blame for being taken advantage of. How so? At first, he was flattered that the leader valued him. Next, he was proud to be offered an important position as the leader’s assistant. But he allowed himself to be duped because he was valued and validated by his boss’s trust and affirmation. The boss’s opinions about Jeremy mattered more than his own. Jeremy didn’t exercise enough self-validation to set boundaries with the leader. Ultimately, he realized that he had allowed himself to be enslaved to the point that he gave up his values for someone else. The key to having this insight was Jeremy’s willingness to see his role in being enslaved.
True freedom from control by others over our lives comes from confidence from within. This means that we are aware of who we are and of our purpose. We are aware of our soul rights. We know what it takes to be ourselves and are willing to sacrifice and begin new practices that help heal our misperceptions.
1. Continue with daily spiritual practices that remind us that our origin and livelihood come from a Higher Power than any power on earth.
2. When we align with the will of the divine, we have freedom from any tyranny, within or without ourselves.
3. We are not separate doers but are intrinsically connected to all those souls and activities that support us and our true purpose. We lose confidence and inner guidance when disconnected from our steadfast support.
4. No one has power over our significance and life’s purpose.
5. We do not think that the things we know, contributions, or skills make us indispensable, secure, and respected.
6. We do not let fear and criticism control decisions. We sense manipulation and coercion and dare to confront them.
7. Our abiding joy comes from our depths, not from having the good graces of those over us.
8. When we are not respected as individuals and when another person on any level possesses us, we take responsibility for that.
9. We can choose to uphold our dignity, resources, and time.
Spiritual practice: How might you allow yourself to be controlled by forces you are fearful of confronting? Explore this possibility in all areas of your life. Consider entering discernment about facing those fears?
Self-inquiry: What do you receive from being compliant?
Prayer: Dear God,
When I realize how I have contributed to my own enslavement, I know that by your spirit I can be free. I pray for your spirit to fill me and overflow me. Amen
